“OK you two, I’m tasking you with looking for our next big project, a real money spinner!”
“Well we can always do a sequel boss?”
“Nah, that’s a given. If the first picture made ANY money then a sequel is obvious. Next!”
“Well Mr. Trumpstein, we could do a prequel or a spin-off for a popular character? Perhaps a TV tie-in?”
“Not bad, but let’s wait for our next superhero franchise to drop then start spreading the rumours on that. Next!”
“How about adapting young adult literature? Harry Potter. Hunger Games and Twilight all made a lot of money sir!”
“That I like the sound of but I don’t understand teenagers – get someone to find out what’s hot, then someone from legal to find out what’s not going to cost a lot in copyright. Next!”
“Well sir, we could re-make a classic property for the 21st Century audience – the gritty re-boot! It’s been done a lot but its popular – Batman, James Bond, Battlestar Galactica, The A-Team, and more horror franchises than I can name. Heck, they even did a dark and edgy Snow White movie recently! What do you think?”
“I think I love it! But you guys need to find me some properties that no-one else will be considering, something no-one would even dream of making grim and nasty. Go to it!”
SEVERAL DAYS LATER……
“OK sir, we’ve got some ideas and mock-up graphics for you!”
Thomas the Tank! Forged in the fires of conflict on the war-torn Isle of Sodor, he escaped to the mainland along with a variety of his colourful military-themed friends.
Percy the personnel carrier, James the jump-jet and others help Thomas and the Fat Commander as soldiers of fortune, fighting injustice or providing backing for ‘Police actions’ in Africa, Eastern Europe and the middle east.
“Thomas would be voiced by Sean Bean if available. Michael Bay would direct.”
Casper the over friendly ghost! “All I want’s a friend – can I keep you?” He’s a lonely, horrific spirit of the dead who doesn’t know where to stop and he stalks and terrifies people while tragically hanging on to existence. What starts out as merely annoying soon becomes sinister as he tries to make friends – forever!
“We’ve got Sarah Hyland from Modern Family pencilled in to be the bitchy teenage girl who he clings to, ruining her social life and driving her insane. Michael Bay would direct”
Yogi Bear 2.0. He’s smarter than the average bear – and deadlier!
Genetically engineered by the government from the combined DNA of grizzlies and serial killers, Yogi escapes from the lab where he was raised into the wilds of Jellystone Park, still sporting the hat and tie his creators cruelly made him wear.
He encounters Ranger John Smith, a battle-scarred ex-special forces veteran with a history trying to put his life back together. Will Yogi control his urges to eat pic-a-nic people or will Ranger Smith be forced to hunt him down?
“For this one sir, we thought Vin Diesel would be the ideal voice for Yogi and Jason Statham would play Ranger Smith. Michael Bay would direct”
“I’ve heard enough! Gentlemen, I have only one thing left to say…..
"Get me Michael Bay!”
4th Wall/ Notes
Remakes, reboots, prequels, sequels, spin-offs, rip-offs, spoofs, homage, tie-ins, adaptations, franchises and more. Do we make truly original content anymore? Somewhere out there, people have come up with far sillier ideas than mine and they are probably casting for pilot episodes right now.
But I’ll continue to watch :) I had another build started that I just didn’t finish in time for Dora the Jungle Queen. My own fault (nights off building for some time with old school friends) but the descriptive text is below if you are interested;
Dora the Queen of the jungle! An older Dora the explorer gets stranded in the jungle after losing Map. She rises to become Queen of the hidden Amazonian jungle civilisation that she finds with her Gorilla companion Boots. They come under threat from the evil treasure hunter Swiper T. Fox who wants all the stars for himself and his army of ninja thieves. Dora is out for revenge on Swiper as he cooked and ate Benny the Bull and Big red Chicken.
“We’d thought Chloe Grace Moretz as Dora, Andy Serkis doing Boots in motion capture and John Malkovich as Swiper. Michael Bay would direct.”
Dora got dropped in favour of Thomas as she didn’t seem too popular with my LUG mates. Heath in particular was vocal for seeing Thomas. Thanks guys and girls!
Good luck to Gabe and everybody else in R3. Thanks to the judges and competitors for their efforts to keep this contest moving along and showing off the talent on the pages.
When it comes to dark and gritty humour, you can never be wrong if you ask an Englishman to write/create something fitting. Looks like you have had a lot of fun creating all those characters, Stu, since each of them is brilliant. I get and love your Michael Bay joke, but your fantastic Casper looks terrifying enough to be directed by Tim Burton. Like Bay, he hasn't done any original work in years. ----- Congratulations for making it to round 4. Well deserved win and thanks for the good laugh.
Thanks for the comment there Stuart. Yes you are right, I'm a Brit. I guess MOC Olympics this year reflects the real Olympics. I've already commented on this fab MOC, however the Thomas the Tanks still cracks me up. Now my son is migrating from loving Thomas to being into all things Batman, I think he'd appreciate your update. As you say, bring on the next categories!
Thomas the Tank has been about the only thing I've seriously laughed out loud at yet this round. That, sir, was brilliant. My vote goes to you on the quantity level and the cleverness level. Gabe's build had some great techniques, but if Michael Bay had to choose, I think he'd go for yours. Great stuff, and see you in round 4!
"Get me Michael Bay!" That was a lot of fun! Thomas the Tank - and his friends! - is my favourite. Maybe because of his name... I would have LOVED to see Dora, the story made me laugh to tears and she's a character more famous here than... Yogi Bear?? Great stuff man, I hope to see you next round!
I'm quite scared that this isn't that far off the reality of a Hollywood board room, but not as scared by the fact that I'd actually quite like to see Thomas the Tank. There should be an inverted category, gritty films given the cute treatment. Anyway, superb building throughout! Good luck.
Quoting Heath 'kik36' Flor
LMFAO oh man that's hilarious! And scary! I agree...there's nothing original these days. Maybe someone should make a movie or show based on your life....Michael Bay will direct. :P
Mwuhahahaha! Over my cooling corpse he would! I'd hold out for the Coen brothers I think. Cheers Heath!
Quoting TF Twitch
"Thomas the Tank" was a punch square in my childhood. Thank you! I love how Michael Bay will direct everything. I wonder what that is supposed to imply...
Hahaha, you've seen Transformers? THAT was a punch square in my childhood! That and all the horror remakes his production company have overseen ensure Michael Bay will remain high on my list of 'People to be dipped head-first in something unpleasant'. Thanks for the comment!
Awesome! I love them all. I'm glad you did a bunch of different gritty reboots so you could tie in Michael Bay. If only that Dora idea could have manifested itself into bricks. Great stuff you have here.
Wonderful! I'd watch every single one of them. Yogi is the winner in my book. His character is so obvious and yet so obviously wrong at the same time. His feet! Wow, his feet just made my day. Awesome entry my friend, good luck :)
Hahaha! The Thomas the Tank Engine build really got me; I used to watch that show when I was little and always thought, "Man, I sure wish they'd stick some guns on these trains...it would be way more exciting." Excellent job and good luck!