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LIU Atlas - Jötunheim
There are billions of stars, millions of planets, but there is only one man, Terrance McDoogal. Welcome to LIU Atlas.
About this creation
LIU Atlas - Jötunheim

The Ludgonian Industrial Union's galaxy contains billions of stars and billions of planets. Unfortunately, most residents of the LIU could only name a handful of these worlds. In order to improve astronomy grades across the LIU, TV2 has started a new program called LIU Atlas. Follow our host, Terrance McDoogal, as he takes you on a tour across the LIU and some of its more obscure worlds.

Note: This episode is presented in full screen. The corresponding dialogue is underneath each photo.

Doog: “Welcome to Season Six of LIU Atlas. I’m your host, Terrance “Doog” McDoogal. Today, we’re visiting the lava world of Jötunheim. Jötunheim suffered a massive impact event about 60,000 years ago. The impact liquefied the planet’s crust and caused huge seismic shifts. Most parts of the planet have since solidified, but vast regions of lava still exist between Jötunheim’s tectonic plates.”

Doog: “Alright folks, I’ve been dropped off here at a work site near one of Jötunheim’s tectonic tears. I’ve been told to bring an environmental suit. The air here is breathable for short stints, but has unsafe levels of sulfur and carbon monoxide. Ah, I think I see my guide now.”

Doog: “Hey. Are you my guide?”
Smith: “Yes. I’m Colorado Smith, an archeologist with the Meditor Institute. You may have heard of my more famous cousin, Michigan Johnson.”
Doog: “Nope, sure haven’t, and the only thing I know about the Meditor Institute is its nickname, the Nerd-itor Institute. Assumedly, you do something nerdy, and therefore boring...”
Smith: “Yes, I’ve heard all the sarcastic nicknames, Nerditor, Boreitor, Club Virgin, et cetera, but they are hardly fitting. The Meditor Institute is a research division of the LIU that focuses on historical studies, like archeology and paleontology. Sure, we don’t get as much street cred as the physicists or the chemists, but what we do is important.”
Doog: “And what is that?”
Smith: “We study extinct alien races and their cultures.”
Doog: “Any profit there?”
Smith: “Unfortunately no. Not unless we find some new form of technology, and that’s rare. Any sufficiently advanced race with technology new to us probably wouldn’t have gone extinct in the first place. I like to think that our studies do more than bring in money though. We help civilization learn about itself. We explain what it is to be alive. We…”
Doog: “You’re pretty lowly funded, aren’t you?”
Smith: “Yes. Well, let’s not dwell on that. Would you like to see what we’ve discovered here on Jötunheim?”
Doog: “Wait. You’ve found an extinct alien race here?”

Smith: “Yes, a race we call the Jotun. My crew is about to head out to the dig site. Care to join us?”
Doog: “Yeah, I guess. I’m not too excited about your little transport over here. It looks like a flying park bench.”

Smith: “Yeah, it handles like one too. Better hold on tight. I told you we weren’t well funded…”

Doog: “What the? This is the Jotun? They’re enormous…”
Smith: “Yes. The bones we’ve found put them at around 54 feet tall, or about nine times taller than you.”
Doog: “Wow. That’s a little terrifying.”

Smith: “We’ve only been here about seven months, but we’ve already found several nearly complete Jotun skeletons. We’ve been able to piece together a lot about the Jotun just by studying there anatomy.”
Doog: “Like what?”
Smith: “Well, they are carnivores. Their arm to leg length ratio of 3:1, indicates that they probably crouched when they walked, using their arms as extra support.”
Doog: “Knuckle draggers huh?”

Smith: “Yeah, I guess you could put it that way. I was going to say that they walked like apes. If you look closely at the hands, you’ll see the stress fractures near the finger joints. They must have weighed several tons.”
Doog: “Check out those claws!”
Smith: “Yeah, they were tridactyl. They have two fingers and an opposable thumb.”

Smith: “We’ve been able to match particulates found between the Jotun’s teeth to some of the other animals we’ve found. They were probably meat eaters.”
Doog: “The best kind of eater.”

Smith: “Yeah. Anyway, the brain cavity is rather small for this sized creature. Until our other discoveries, we had doubts about its intelligence and sentience.”
Doog: “What other discoveries?”
Smith: “Follow me.”

Smith: “We’ve found several small clusters of small animals like this. Mixed within the animals bones were bone fragments from the Jotun. It appears the Jotun had domesticated these animals.”
Doog: “These giant creatures ate these tiny things?”
Smith: “Why not? I mean, we eat squirrels and rats all the time.”
Doog: “Speak for yourself Colorado. I never intentionally eat squirrels or rats.”
Smith: “Oh. Uh, I guess I forgot what normal people eat. Did I mention the size of our budget?”

Smith: “By analyzing the these creatures’ fossilized excrement, we’ve been able to piece together some more details about Jötunheim’s environment in the pre-impact era. The planet was lush and sported a variety of plant-like organisms. We’ve identified nearly fifty different plant species.”
Doog: “Any chance you found enough DNA to resurrect any of these species? Perhaps the Jotun?”
Smith: “No. Probably not. There are too many gaps in the genetic code for us to resurrect any of these species, especially the complex Jotun. We’d probably see an increase in funding if that were possible.”
Doog: “Gotcha. So, anything else? Is this the only evidence of the Jotun’s intelligence?”
Smith: “Oh, no. There’s more. Much more. Shall we return to camp?”

Smith: “There had to be a million better places to put our camp than on the edge of the lava, but unfortunately this is where we made the discovery. Mapping scans of this area revealed a huge chamber under the rock here.”
Doog: “Well, what was it? Don’t leave me hanging!”
Smith: “Come on, let’s see.”
Doog: “Sigh. All you guides and your dramatics…”

Smith: “It took us several weeks to bore our way into the chamber. To save money, we sealed up this tunnel, and we now use it as our camp.”
Doog: “Very homely.”
Smith: “Yeah, I guess. Alright. We‘re almost there.”

Smith: “Alas, we’re here, one of the Great Star Chambers of Jötunheim.”
Doog: “Amazing. This was built by the Jotun?”
Smith: “Yep. This one of six chambers we’ve found in this area. Each depicts a different area of the night sky. There are only two chambers that are fully intact. Three have been heavily damaged, and one has been completely destroyed. It’s a shame.”
Doog: “So it’s like a star map?”
Smith: “Sort of. It’s more like a collection of constellations. It probably served a more religious purpose. Perhaps it even helped to foretell the seasons. More importantly, it has taught us a lot about the Jotun’s intelligence. They had art, architecture, a writing system, astronomy, and so on.”

Doog: “Have you been able to decipher any of the writing?”
Smith: “Yes, but not much. Our best astrolinguistic and xenolinguistic experts have been piecing together the language using advanced AI’s. It’s hard to decipher a language when you have absolutely no comparison. This language is even more difficult considering it is a logographic language where each symbol represents a word. Each symbol must be deciphered on its own.”
Doog: “How accurate is the astronomy?”
Smith: “Very accurate, at the time. Stars shift at different rates. All the stars are still there, but not in the same locations. Many of the Jotun’s constellations no longer exist. Since we know how fast these stars are moving in comparison to Jötunheim, we’ve been able to compare their current locations to their location in the constellation and determine that this map was made approximately 65,000 years ago.”

Smith: “We’ve been able to determine what some of the constellations were called from the partially deciphered writing. The large one in the upper left that looks like a being was called Mother Star. It appears she was involved in some type of creation mythology.”

Smith: “The constellation in the lower right corner is called the Eye of ‘Something’. We haven’t been able to determine who’s eye. The large blue star in the middle is Sidere Artifex, one of the brightest stars in the LIU Galaxy. Due to its high visibility, it’s a common star in most planets’ constellations.”
Doog: “What’s that huge red star up top?”
Smith: “We’re not entirely sure about that. It’s not a star, we haven’t been able to find it anywhere. It may have been a planet, but if so, it’s not here anymore. We believe it might be the object that impacted Jötunheim, but we’ll need to study it further.”
Doog: “Ah. Well, anything else?”
Smith: “Not yet, but for a small fee, you can be included in our mailing list. We’ll keep you updated on any new discoveries.”
Doog: “No thanks.”

Doog: “Well folks, Jötunheim is an interesting place…well it used to be. Archeologists have uncovered an extinct race of beings that evolved a moderate level of intelligence. Perhaps they would be part of our galactic community if not for the impact event that wiped them out. Geesh, think of the size of the public bathrooms. Oh well, see ya next time.”

65,000 years ago…


 I like it 
  December 31, 2014
Revisiting the entire season over the next few days -- Still love this one!
 I like it 
  September 22, 2014
Nice work and great story. Is Colorado Smith by any chance the great great great great grandson of Hitler? lol
 I like it 
  January 6, 2014
How come the teeth were not aligned 65,000 years ago? ... XD
 I like it 
  January 5, 2014
Ha, ha! Stellar star chamber! A Looney Jotun & Jumpin' Lava splashes! All make for Great Stuff! :)
 I like it 
  January 4, 2014
Back with a vengeance! ~H
Ludgonious .
 I like it 
Gray Smiley
  January 3, 2014
I know someone's played KOTOR.
 I like it 
  January 3, 2014
the star map chamber with alien writing was great.
 I like it 
  January 3, 2014
Nice episode :D a great addition to dougs adventures. Have to say though, the plot, and the whole starmap and picture at the end really do remind me of the film Prometheus.
Ludgonious .
 I like it 
Thomas Floyd
  January 2, 2014
LIU CRIMEBUSTERS If you see anyone with Jotun bones or any pre-LIU artifacts be sure they don't go on the black market and make them sell it to us for more profit
 I like it 
  January 2, 2014
A very interesting episode. The closing shot was a great surprise. Will there be another story from the land of giants?
 I like it 
  January 2, 2014
Overarching sub-plot? I hope so!
 I like it 
  January 2, 2014
Great shot of the giant Jotun at the end! The panelling and the writing in the Star Chamber is brilliant too. Another excellent episode!
 I like it 
  January 2, 2014
65,000 years ago... Hmmmm? Wonder where that's going... As usual, glued to my seat for the next one! Of course it may just be because my daughter left her paste on my chair but we can pretend for a while can't we? ~ Chris.
 I like it 
  January 2, 2014
Great episode, I was glued to the screen to see what was coming next!
 I like it 
  January 1, 2014
Top notch all the way around. Great concept. The star chambers look great, and what can I say about the Jotun -- awesome! Love the dig at nerds, ya nerd.
 I like it 
  January 1, 2014
cool episode but doog didnt do anything stupid this time! thats a first
  January 1, 2014
I have to ask, how advanced were the Jotun really and what was the object??
 I like it 
  January 1, 2014
Ah, good old underfunded scientists. Some things never change... ;) Excellent episode, always fun to see a lava planet. Great builds with the skull and star room, and the line about rats is priceless. I can't help but wonder though, if there's only one man, and it's Doog, why does he have such a hard time getting girls? ;)
 I made it 
  January 1, 2014
Quoting El Barto ! Interesting use of the Norse nomenclature in this one, too.
Thanks! Here's a little LIU Atlas Easter Egg: Most of the lava planets in the LIU Galaxy have Norse names. Muspell, Niflheim, and now Jötunheim.
 I like it 
  January 1, 2014
No, must be Eye of Jupiter! Awesome episode, Boss! Cool sets, and nifty concepts. Interesting use of the Norse nomenclature in this one, too. Just hope the guy in the last pic isn't Loki...
 I like it 
  January 1, 2014
Great episode. I enjoyed learning about this ancient race, and the bonus at the end was great. My favorite part? The star chart that might possibly include the object that doomed the Jotun.
 I like it 
  January 1, 2014
Really cool concept of having a fossilized civilization! The alien runes in the last set look amazing!
 I like it 
  January 1, 2014
Eye of Chaos perhaps? Anyways, nice work, as usual, Ludgonious; and an interesting concept!
 I like it 
  January 1, 2014
Cool! The new season came sooner than expected.
 I like it 
  January 1, 2014
That Jotun at the end looks awesome!
By Ludgonious .
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