This would have been my entry into the first round of the 2014 Bio-Cup buuutt... this being my first post to MOCpages, and me having to figure posting out a few hours before the deadline ended up being my downfall..
Oh well, now I know and I look forward to seeing all of the entries and rounds for this year and really look forward to next years competition.
Anyways, Enjoy!
Comments
|
|
 |
I like it |
|
December 28, 2014 |
Welcome to MOCPages, You made a great MOC right there. |
|
|
|
I like it |
|
November 6, 2014 |
You are really good at making weapons haha. I just use stock crap with my weapons. |
|
|
|
I like it |
|
July 25, 2014 |
Welcome to mocpages! Too bad you missed the deadline, I did the exact same thing with my first moc. Hope to see you again both around mocpages and in the Bio cup next year! :) |
|
|
|
I like it |
|
Stormjay Exserion July 24, 2014 |
Hi Dylan, and welcome to MOCpages! Sorry about you not being able to get in the timeframe. I'm Stormjay Exserion (you can just call me Stormjay), best known here for unusually long critiques. So, here is the first of what might be many long comments from me.
Making female MOCs is a fickle thing, since you have to balance out realistic female proportions with the general stereo types. I have to say, this MOC did not strike me as female until you referenced the chest, which isn't a very good sign. When I first saw the chest I thought it was an oversized male torso. On the plus side, though, it's good that you did give her some bulk -- I hate it when people attempt to make female MOCs by making them anorexic. I think that probably the best way to make her more visually female is either to change her mask (there are certain masks that have more feminine qualities to them than the one she has) or reworking her "hair" so that it's notable from the front (with pigtails or something like that.) Referring to the quality of the MOC itself, in some places it's good, but in others (specifically the abdomen and lower legs) the lack of armor or well-executed greebling just makes it look awkward (an issue that I've struggled with in my own MOCs.) The weapons looks good, but I think the rifle could benefit from being monochrome or color-blocked. |
|
|
 |
I made it |
|
July 24, 2014 |
Quoting Evan Botkin
Welcome to the Pages! This a very good first MOC; much better than my first. Sorry you couldn't make it into the contest. My only problems are that it doesn't really look super feminine, which is not a big deal really but it looks like you tried to make it look feminine so yeah.... Also the feet are too small but otherwise. It's a nice looking MOC but I don't think it quite has the look you seem to have been going for.
Thanks for welcoming me. This isn't my first Moc, I've been Mocing for a while but this was my first post to MOCpages. I wil be uploading all of my currently built Mocs soon including my nameless selfmoc(my buddy icon). Also, I appreciate the criticisms, its just me before posting so its nice to have outside opinions on things also. Thanks again! |
|
|
|
I made it |
|
July 24, 2014 |
Quoting Stormjay Exserion
Hi Dylan, and welcome to MOCpages! Sorry about you not being able to get in the timeframe. I'm Stormjay Exserion (you can just call me Stormjay), best known here for unusually long critiques. So, here is the first of what might be many long comments from me.
Making female MOCs is a fickle thing, since you have to balance out realistic female proportions with the general stereo types. I have to say, this MOC did not strike me as female until you referenced the chest, which isn't a very good sign. When I first saw the chest I thought it was an oversized male torso. On the plus side, though, it's good that you did give her some bulk -- I hate it when people attempt to make female MOCs by making them anorexic. I think that probably the best way to make her more visually female is either to change her mask (there are certain masks that have more feminine qualities to them than the one she has) or reworking her "hair" so that it's notable from the front (with pigtails or something like that.) Referring to the quality of the MOC itself, in some places it's good, but in others (specifically the abdomen and lower legs) the lack of armor or well-executed greebling just makes it look awkward (an issue that I've struggled with in my own MOCs.) The weapons looks good, but I think the rifle could benefit from being monochrome or color-blocked.
Thank you for welcoming me to MOCpages! That makes sense about her manlier female traits, and I agree with your anti-anorexic Femocs, they just look awkward. Did you notice the "flower" in her hair though? I thought that was a nice female touch. This Moc however was made to be "7yo proof" ideally and thats why her arms are quite bulky. Also, for her mask, I really wanted to use those LEGOŽ Knight's armor parts in a moc and it fit nicely to her I thought because she is a warrior type figure with the short hair and larger features. I do notice what your saying about the awkwadness of it in some places though and i will work on that for the future for sure.
I do think I will keep her though and make her more feminine and less bulky so we shall see how that goes in the future but at the moment I have a few WIPs so look for those aslo!
Thanks again! |
|
|
|
I like it |
|
July 24, 2014 |
Welcome to the Pages! This a very good first MOC; much better than my first. Sorry you couldn't make it into the contest. My only problems are that it doesn't really look super feminine, which is not a big deal really but it looks like you tried to make it look feminine so yeah.... Also the feet are too small but otherwise. It's a nice looking MOC but I don't think it quite has the look you seem to have been going for. |
|
|
|
I made it |
|
July 24, 2014 |
Quoting Yuri Fassio
Sturdy, intense technic work. Very cool equipment too. Too bad for the time frame but as I always say, "Rules are only fair if they apply to everyone". Better luck next year :)
Thank you for your comment. I really like working with technic parts to be nearly custom and if not, then entirely so. Yeah but next year will be a full on onslaught of my mocing abilities so be prepared!! >:D
Just curious, what would you have rated this if it were in the timeframe? |
|
|
|
I like it |
|
July 24, 2014 |
Sturdy, intense technic work. Very cool equipment too. Too bad for the time frame but as I always say, "Rules are only fair if they apply to everyone". Better luck next year :) |
|
|
|
I made it |
|
July 24, 2014 |
Quoting Axel Schouten
Too bad you're to late because it is a nice moc.
Proportions are good (maybe you could give the upper arms a bit less bulk though). Overall good work, good luck in next year's contest :)
Thank you! I appreciate it. |
|
|
|
I made it |
|
July 24, 2014 |
Quoting Instant Noodles
If this is disqualified, I'm sorry and do come back next year. If not, Quite a nice figure, The colours are a bit messy but the weapons look quite cool. 6 points from me.
Yes unfortunately it is because I posted it at 2~ish am on the 24th because i waited so long to figure posting out. Oh well though.
Thank you though! What would you reccomend for the colors? |
|
|
If this is disqualified, I'm sorry and do come back next year. If not, Quite a nice figure, The colours are a bit messy but the weapons look quite cool. 6 points from me. |
|
|
|
I like it |
|
July 24, 2014 |
Too bad you're to late because it is a nice moc.
Proportions are good (maybe you could give the upper arms a bit less bulk though). Overall good work, good luck in next year's contest :) |
|
|
More from Dylan More across MOCpages
|
|
|
