This is the first part of my new series! Please read and comment.
About this creation
After a attack on Grevious' fleet. Grevious cowardly runs and hides at the near by planet Mygeeto. Desprate to catch him the 282nd legion under command of there new Jedi general, Ki-Paul, pursues the droid general.
Commander J's gun ship "the Hornet" lands on Mygeeto.
The doors open and the clones led by Ki-Paul come running out.
Suddenly something hits the wing.
Commander J: What was that?
Ki-Paul: I don't know, but we won't be going anywhere without it being repaired.
Commander J: Get to work on repairing the ship, we will cover you.
Pilots: Yes sir.
The pilots get to work on repairing the wing.
A droid tank comes from the bridge to reinforce the droids.
A shot of the droids side.
The clones send out a walker.
Commander J shoots down a droid.
A STAP shoot a clone.
The walker shoots a destroyer.
Commander J: Looks up there, it's Grevious! We won't be able to reach him.
Ki-Paul: Then we will have to bring him down to us. Split up and sestroy the support beams.
Commander J: Yes sir.
The men split up
Commander J: We have to take destory that turret to get to the support beams.
Commander J takes out a gernade.
And destroys the turret.
Commander J and Skillet set the charges.
The other clones set the charges too.
The clones run back to stay clear of the explosion.
Grevious: Ha! They are retreating! Kill them!
The platform callapses.
The clones run over to search for Grevious
Trooper: I found something.
Ki-Paul: Good work! It looks like it lead to the sewers.
Ki-Paul: Me and Commander J will go down. Stay here and make sure no more droids come.
The climb down into the swers.
Commander J: What is that smell?
Ki-Paul: Were in a sewer! What do you think!
Ki-Paul: Look over there, it's a bomb!
Commander J: This thing can blow up half the city!
Ki-Paul: Can you dissable it?
Commander J: Mabye, Wait. It has a timer on it. 20 seconds left! We need to get out of here!
They hurry back out of the sewer.
Pilot: We fixed the wing but it won't get far with out the parts we need.
Commander J: Good enough! This whole place is about to explode!
They get into the ship and fly off.
They look back and see the explosians behind them.
Well what do you think? Please rate and commnet.
Comments
|
 |
I like it |
|
April 15, 2009 |
awsome i was liek its a
BOMB ZOMG!!!!! |
|
 |
I like it |
|
February 26, 2009 |
Awsome story! I like the support beams idea. |
|
 |
I like it |
|
January 24, 2009 |
great but you made some spelling mistakes but i love the comic |
|
 |
I like it |
|
January 21, 2009 |
I like it! The whole series is good and I can not wait to see more from you! |
|
 |
I like it |
|
January 21, 2009 |
omg this is awesome!! i smell a mini Fed coming along. check out my MOCs. |
|
 |
I like it |
|
January 21, 2009 |
|
|
 |
I like it |
|
January 20, 2009 |
Awesome! keep doing! |
|
 |
I like it |
|
January 18, 2009 |
Let's make our MOC-Off best out of three. |
|
rate mine please. may the force be with you. |
|
 |
I like it |
|
January 17, 2009 |
Yup, no prob, J! Always glad too help out a friend!! PS-May the Force be with you! |
|
 |
I like it |
|
January 17, 2009 |
My entry for the MOC-Off is uploaded. Check it out, and good luck! PS-It is spelled "Legends" not "Ledgends". |
|
 |
I like it |
|
January 16, 2009 |
Fed said that he can't judge. |
|
 |
I like it |
|
January 16, 2009 |
OK, lets get building on a starship. |
|
 |
I like it |
|
January 16, 2009 |
Oh, OK, Republic Starship then. Great! |
|
 |
I like it |
|
January 16, 2009 |
Oh, I already asked CC to judge, but I'll ask Fed and T. Also, for the topic, how about a Republic Minifig? |
|
 |
I like it |
|
January 16, 2009 |
Also, lets try and get some of the Elite ARCs as judges. |
|
 |
I like it |
|
January 16, 2009 |
Sure, the theme can be Republic. What do you want the topic to be first: Starship, Minifigs, etc.? |
|
 |
I like it |
|
January 16, 2009 |
I can see that you like yellow, white, and blue, and sure I'll help judge! |
|
 |
I like it |
|
January 16, 2009 |
You were saying that I should have an MOC-Off. Would you like to have one with me? |
|
Very cool stuff from Star Wars, I was going to ask you if you want to be my ally? If yes, post it in my batman comic #2. |
|
 |
I made it |
|
January 16, 2009 |
Quoting Josh LaFollette
cool comic nice action and script. just curious did you base it off of fed's stories and creation? you did the explosion very well too. all over great work.
I try not to base if off anyones things, but I did get some insperation from Fed. |
|
 |
I like it |
|
January 16, 2009 |
thats a cool comic nice action and script. just curious did you base it off of fed's stories and creation? you did the explosion very well too. all over great work. |
|
 |
I like it |
|
January 16, 2009 |
Very awesome stuff. |
|
 |
I like it |
|
January 16, 2009 |
cool nice and not to long |
|
 |
I like it |
|
Supreme Commander Michael Sloper January 15, 2009 |
Awesome! I like the detail it looks like Mygeeto. The dialog is good to. Any way great job! |
|
 |
I like it |
|
January 15, 2009 |
Wow, great detail, story, and Great Job, I can't wait for the next. I love it! |
|
 |
I like it |
|
January 15, 2009 |
You have a Clone named Skillet. That is too awesome. |
|
 |
I like it |
|
January 15, 2009 |
Nice work!! |
|
 |
I made it |
|
January 15, 2009 |
Quoting Elite ARC Fed
I see some similar Mygeeto with the ruins, anyway did the whole planet explode or just that area ofbattle? Nice comic by the way!!!
Just part of the city they where in exploded. |
|
|
More from Lord More across MOCpages
|
|
|